By BeckEye from The Pop Eye*
I love Christmas. I do. Generally, I can easily wade through the sea of commercialization and "gimme gimme gimme" attitudes and enjoy the holiday for what it really means. However, there are a few things that really irk me. For now, I'll focus on one: the deluge of Kay Jewelers commercials. You've all seen these ads, and you all know the cutesy little jingle that accompanies each one..."every kiss begins with Kay."
Maybe it's slightly irrational and, yes, there is so much more going on in the world to be pissed off about, but these commercials make me so angry. Excuse me while I get up on my soap, er, ring box for a moment.
Men: Every kiss does not begin with Kay. At least it shouldn't. If you only get kisses from your woman when you give her expensive gifts, you could be married to or dating an actual prostitute. It might be time to rethink your relationship.
Women: Jewelry does not equal love. If your husband/boyfriend is showering you with assloads of jewelry, he's probably either cheating on you or cheating with you. If that's not the case, your man may feel like wasting all his money on sparkly trinkets is the only way to get your attention. If you're putting that kind of price tag on your affections, you could be an actual prostitute. It might be time to rethink your priorities.
Of course, Kay isn't the only offender here in the "love for sale" commercial genre, but their stupid catchphrase bothers me the most. I suppose if they were being honest, the slogan would be, "Every Kiss Begins with Kold Hard Kash." I hear that DeBeers' tagline, "A Diamond is Forever" was actually shortened from "A Diamond is Forever, But Your Relationship is Not," and Jared's was originally "Sure, Sometimes He Beats Me, But...But He Went to Jared!"
*If this post feels at all familiar, then you have loved me for a looooong time, because it's a slightly modified 2006 rerun from my blog.