Thursday, March 18, 2010

Old School

by Katrocket from fotosynthesis

Internet banners are rarely featured on Fire That Agency!, but hey, I rarely contribute to this blog that I've neglected for so very long, so it's a fitting occasion for a comeback.

I saw this online ad last week and it compelled me to return here and ask you just WHAT THE FUCK DOES THE FRIGHTENED OLD MAN HAVE TO DO WITH A SCHOOL LOAN?!

Oh Agency, you are so fucking fired.

I understand that if I earn less than $45,000 a year, I'm totally going to need a grant to go back to school. I'm not sure how clicking on my state will help, but where you really lose me is with the photo.

What exactly is going on here? Grandpa's not going to the bathroom on his own, so I doubt he's up for college. So is this the guy who's granting money to qualified people? Do I have to rob this scared little man for tuition?!

Poor fella doesn't look well at all. Maybe he's just as confused as I am? "How the hell did my photo end up on the innerwebs? Goddamn kids!"

I guess on some level this works because they definitely got my attention. They also got me to come out of semi-retirement to tell the rest of you about it.

Goddamn kids.


Candy's daily Dandy said...

Huh? Maybe he's some bis-ass philanthropist with tons of money just waiting to doll it out to sick fucks with "daddy complexes".

Sugar Grand Daddy.

SkylersDad said...

Make less than 45K??!! Hell yes I make less than that, why I never made 45K my whole god dammed life you little whipper snapper! Why are you taking my picture? Never seen an old man drop his colostomy bag before? Get over here closer so I can beat you with my walker, and I am takin off the tennis balls you little punk!

BeckEye said...

HAHAHAHAHA. I can totally see this old dude hanging out in the quad, strumming "American Pie" on his guitar.

Anonymous said...

Aw it's sweet. The dude's 80 years old, can finally afford to retire and now everyone wants him to spend his hard earned retirement budget on getting that elusive degree so he can....I don't know. Know more answers at Trivial Pursuit? You have to wonder what was in the mind of whoever made that ad. Was he just a placeholder? Is it school for seniors? WTF indeed.

Or...maybe he's just 21 and does a lot of drugs?

ÄsK AliCë said...

Ok, wait...isn't that Hasselhoff?

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